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As a prepared myself for a two hour flight to Florida, I pondered the term ‘self-care’. I was a young Black woman taught to work hard and care for others, and this trip was much needed therapy for myself. But, the question I asked myself was: “Why am I so burned out in the first place? It’s because out of 365 days in a year, I spend 5 of those actually taking care of my self physically, mentally, and emotionally. I did not make self-care my priority, and though people around me have died because they didn’t make self-care a priority - this trip was for me to stop a generational curse of “putting others before yourself”.
Self-care is a concept that’s so omnipresent, it can be hard for beginners to divine what it actually means. If you read Twitter or follow Ellen DeGeneres, you have heard the term. Are the non-medical coping mechanisms we sub in for affordable, professional medical attention “self-care”? Is turning on ‘Do Not Disturb’ before bedtime “self-care”? Is eating a chicken parm “self-care”?
The flight attendant stood at the front of the plane mechanically, giving safety instructions for the flight. It was apparent that she could probably give those same instructions in her sleep because she had done it many times. I had heard them many times before, but something she said caught my attention this time. “In the event of an emergency, the oxygen mask will drop from overhead. Put the mask over your nose and mouth. If you are traveling with a small child or an infant, put your mask on first, then help the child. Care for yourself, before you care for others.
It could safe your life, and those around you.” Suddenly, what she said made sense. A lack of oxygen due to a depressurized airplane cabin would cause hypoxia, a lack of oxygen to the brain.
As I winged toward spring break, I read an article online - learning self care is a concept that emerged in the 2010s as a response to the mindfulness movement, In books like A Year of Self-Care and Self-Care for Beginners, and The Complete Guide to self-Care psychologists and advise self-denying women to write down their needs in journals as a means for finding out what they want in life.
I was intrigued as I had been a highly motivated college student and good daughter and older sister. But it did not speak to me. It needed to take my own journey. Here is what I found out.
Mental health superstar who calls herself The New York Times defines self-care as “any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health”.
However, for some, that behavior is not always natural, especially if that is not what you saw in your family when you grew up. In my Southside, big tight-knit family, I cannot remember my grandfather taking care of himself before he took care of us. The memory I have is of a man - a 6 foot 3 - 300 pound man, who rose early to make breakfast, help us get dressed and get us off to school.
While we were gone to school, he went to work while still managing to have a dinner made for us. But, I also remember him having many health problems. He loved fried food and his blood pressure rose, but he was too busy to do anything about them, even when my father would try to tell him to change his eating habits.
Like many men in his ethnic group, my grandfather was diagnosed with diabetes in his mid thirties (when my dad was a child), but continued to struggle with the disease as he got older which led to his untimely death. I had to wonder - if my grandfather took care of himself better, would he still be alive today?
So, I began this journey of wondering how does self care really affect your life expectancy.
First, I spoke with Marsha E. Gorens, MD, an African American female doctor at Northwestern University hospital. She stated: “More than 34 million Americans have diabetes (about 1 in 10), and approximately 90-95% of them have type 2 diabetes,” she said. “Type 2 diabetes most often develops in people over age 45, but more and more children, teens, and young adults are also developing it.” Type 2 diabetes is not a death sentence, Gorens said, but it is a disease that you can control with proper ‘self-care', or it can kill you with no self care at all.
I wondered how much living healthily and self-care could be related. Gorens stated: “You see, diabetes and self-care is something you can bond together to successfully and healthily live with this disease. You may be able to manage your diabetes with healthy eating and being active, or your doctor may prescribe insulin, other injectable medications, or oral diabetes medicines to help manage your blood sugar and avoid complications. You’ll still need to eat healthy and be active if you take insulin or other medicines.”
Based on the results of the present study, self-care education can increase life expectancy in patients by empowering patients in terms of self-care and increasing their awareness in dealing with the side effects of illness and treatment.
We all know exercise is good for us, but do we really know how good it is? Daily exercise can help you both physically and mentally, boosting your mood and reducing stress and anxiety, not to mention helping you shed extra weight. Of course, it might be hard to go to the gym every day, so try to incorporate other exercises, such as walking, tennis, or yoga, which may be able to fit into your schedule more easily. The most important thing is to create a routine that works for you.
The food we eat has the potential to either keep us healthy or contribute to weight gain or diseases such as diabetes, but it can also keep our minds working and alert. Eating the right foods can help prevent short-term memory loss and inflammation, both of which can have long-term effects on the brain and, in turn, the rest of the body.
Some of the most amazing self-care foods include fatty fish, blueberries, nuts, green leafy veggies, and brassicas, like broccoli. We all know that. It’s hard to follow.
Learning to say no is really hard; many of us feel obligated to say yes when someone asks for our time or energy. However, if learning how to the care of yourself, before you take care of others is essential. As self-care has become more mainstream, the term has been used so frequently that it’s hard to nail down exactly what it is. Here, we explore the trend, how we can define it, and what it can do for your long-term health.
As my plane landed in sunny Fort Lauderdale, Florida, I rose from my seat, armed with new knowledge, and stepped into my new life. I was terribly eager to make my doctors appointment once I land back home. I wanted to take the proper steps to ensure I can have a long and prosperous life.
The life my Grandfather didn’t have a chance to complete. I took out my phone while waiting at the baggage claim to look up healthy food options in the area. I also made time in the trip to exercise. This trip was much more than spring break, it was a life changing wake-up call.